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From struggle to light and joy

In December 2016 our daughter saw her first light. It was hard to decide her birth plan because I wanted the family to be alone while my partner was the voice of logic (which lately is good friends with attained speed and fear). He was very right to be concerned. In May we had moved with our three boys to an island with very bad connection to the mainland, away from all the respected birth clinics in Greece. The island’s population is about 20,000. Yet the births on the island are close to 30 a year, all in the hospital. The people who do this, are most likely people who have no ‘better’ choice, Roma usually, sometimes Albanian, very rarely Greeks. Generally those who cannot afford to go to the bigger cities on the mainland for childbirth.

Lilou’s birth was perfect for us! We all enjoyed every moment. She slid out of me in a little studio rental in the village, about 40 kilometers away from a hospital. My midwife, doctor and doula soul sisters in Athens wanted to join me and help us, but Ι needed to be alone with my family to get the most out of this experience. I contacted the midwives on the island to get help for a case of emergency and mostly for someone to stich me up if I tore. The midwives were scared and refused to come to me. They said if I needed them I should go to the hospital. My birth fairies in Athens supported all my wishes and tried to give me solutions faster than my brain storming crazy plans. So, Elda our Birthlight gate in Greece and my beloved friend, said ‘Oh, I know! I will send you my stitching gear and then I am sure you will find a way.’ She was right. I did not need her equipment in the end, but she had opened a new way for me.

I could spend pages telling you about it, even though it was about two hours long. That would be a nice interesting read and some inspiration. This time though, I only want to give you hints of the details that paint a picture about it and move on to how Birthlight opened and carved the way for this birth and how Birthlight relates more to how my family felt around this pregnancy and birth and how I and my family have been benefitted by Birthlight.

I first came in contact with Birthlight in 2008, a couple of months before my first birth. Elda had lately met Rozanna and was yet experimenting with Birthlight, knowing very little from it yet. What I got from Birthlight then, was not pushing the baby out, two or three different breaths to accompany contractions and in between spaces and a nice read about angels.

After that birth, I got as much information as I could about Birthlight. I went to seminar after seminar in Greece and in Britain, to every Birthlight conference, back to every seminar; even I had already been there. I started training as a tutor for baby yoga with Sally. And from all of that, other routes attracted me and I followed those too, Doula trainings, energetic healing training, personal development seminars. It all led to where Birthlight says it will bring you to. The greater enjoyment of birth and babies. The greater enjoyment of birth and babies.

What good are a safe healthy pregnancy and birth and a safe healthy baby if you are miserable or just surviving? In zombie mode? I hold Birthlight and Rozanna and Elda who brought it to us in Greece and Francoise and Sally who gave their life energy for it, to be the most important part of my life. Of my DNA legacy.

How did that happen for me? Was it the breaths I learned? Was it the pelvis micro movements? The easier handling of my babies? Yes all that added up, but basically, not really. In Birthlight, women and families have the opportunity to get on the right track to illumination and happiness without even knowing that is what they are really doing. You go to a Birthlight class believing you are learning some new fancy moves for you and your baby. Plus you have a lot of fun doing that. But Birthlight is really teaching you that this is already knowledge in your body. Body wisdom, which you have forgotten with feeding your brain too much, fighting your body and forgetting your soul. You then come happier out of your class thinking moving and relaxing with your baby – in or out of utero- is what did it for you that day. Yes, that helps you feel happier, but how about the attitude of the teacher which runs in everyone in that class? What does the teacher speak less with words and more with the rest of her behavior? Another priceless for our times Birthlight motto: ‘no guilt, no blame, no shame’. No guilt, no blame, no shame. Is it an exaggeration to repeat it? No. Play it in your head as long as it takes you to get out of this vicious cycle of being inside this body brain of yours. No guilt, no blame, no shame.

And then what? Then there is space. Space for new better things, that do not end up in feelings of punishment or emptiness. Then you will have more and more glimpses of the beautiful soul that you are. That is what happens to me too, because I am still working on it. That is the way to a more beautiful birth. It does not have to be in a rental in the middle of nowhere without any professional help. It only needs to be a day –or two- you and your family enjoy. Because no matter what happens that day, there will definitely be parts of it that stay with all of you forever. The overall taste of birth stays with you forever. You the mother, but also the child born that day and all the friends and family that cared about this birth that day. There will be suspense and maybe some tension. There will be fear. There might be awkwardness; there might be some drama. But what are we left with after every specific birth? Bitterness? Joy? Betrayal? Abandonment and loneliness? Connection and love? A day of exquisite spirituality? Or merely another day of handling extraordinary life matters in a mundanely everyday life way? Birthlight can light up the way for an enjoyable spiritual birth.

(There is an astounding relation between love and spirituality. Love brings spirituality and spirituality brings love. They both start with connection and take us to joy. Where can you get these ingredients for your happiness? Other places too, but surely in Birthlight. Birthlight is the place I would chose over and over in many lifetimes for my journey to Constant Joy. Because Birthlight does it lightly as it promises. It really meets you where you are. Absolutely, totally pleasantly. Effortlessly. Just as my daughter slid out of her last home into more light.

What kind of connection does it take to get all this started? Any. Just connection. That is the beauty of it all. That is the miracle that takes place in your Birthlight classes. Yes. Connect with your body and that will lead you to your greater enjoyment of birth and babies; the greater enjoyment of yourself and all of life. A look at your session-neighbor can start it all. A touch of your belly in relaxation. A shared laugh brought about by a Birthlight silly walk. Connecting to water feeling safe and relaxed. A deep breath connecting to your inner realms without knowing. Joined relaxation may do it. Or just realizing that that feeling of lighter breath and shoulders after class is what the others are also experiencing. A genuine smile between two in class or just a loving touch by your Birthlight teacher might do it for you. The awareness that you are sharing this stage of your life with those around you might start your beautiful journey to connection, spirituality, love and joy.)

So, if you asked me if it was due to what I have found in Birthlight that I had this free unassisted birth, which all my family enjoyed so much, my answer is yes. If you ask me if Birthlight will lead you to the same thing, my answer will be no. Birthlight brought me where I needed to go and Yes. It can do the same for you. It is Ok that we have different needs. The thing we do share is we all want to enjoy our lives and that is critically affected by our major life events, like the birth of our children. Then, Yes! With Birthlight we can all increase our levels of enjoying birth and babies.

Rania Eramaki